Whenever the Zombie Apocalypse finally occurs, there are certain to be some among us who are actually prepared. Let yourself be one of them! This buyer guide will outline the best weapons available to help guard against a zombie attack, and the ideal features one would find on them.
Most zombie hunters agree that axes are the most efficient weapons against zombies, and we’ve sought out their guidance for help determining which are the best of the best. A key factor they emphasized is this: One of the greatest advantages of an axe over other types of weapons is their silence. A silent axe is better for zombie hunting than loud gunshots because you can finish one off without alerting all the others in the vicinity. Brilliant!
Let’s take a look at some of the other prominent features of a great zombie-killing axe:
How to Buy the Best Zombie Axe
Before you select your zombie axe, let’s take a look at each part and see if it has what you’ll need for a safe and efficient zombie experience:
The Handle
Most of the top zombie hunters agree that a metal axe handle is preferable to a wooden one, as the metal ones are far more resistant. Metal axe handles will give you every opportunity to lob off countless zombie heads without needing to reattach the axe head or anything breaking off or losing its sharp edge in the process.
The Blade
Another important tip to remember for axe shopping: when considering your blade, first consider your tasks. What will you be using your axe to accomplish? In this case, we’ve got one task that stands out: zombie hunting. Therefore, we’ll make sure we find an axe with a sharp blade that stays sharp as long as possible -- and is easily sharpened when it does become dull.
Design
With regard to design, it’s always great to look for multifunctionality. You can, through meticulous shopping, ultimately have the perfect zombie hunting axe that doubles as a large hammer. Some come with formidable piercing tools attached as well. This gives your axe numerous functions.
Not only is it a zombie killer, but it can break down doors and other types of barricades, crush locks, dig the ground if needed, hammer in stakes, and more. The best part of this multifunctionality is the axe’s ability to make other weapons and/or shelter. Basically, if you’ve got one great axe, you’ve got several superb weapons in the making, as well as a place to stay safe from infection and the elements.
The Top 10 Zombie Axes of 2021
1. Cold Steel Trench Hawk Axe
For the ultimate in zombie preparedness, you’d be wise to check out the Cold Steel Trench Hawk Axe. At a solid 19 inches of the most superior quality material, Cold Steel equips this axe with a razor sharp edge and shock-resistant handle. This axe can withstand lengthy hard use, can easily be replaced after wearing out, and comes with a patented sheath.
Pros:
- Lightweight at only 1.4 pounds.
- High quality; well-made.
- Fits perfectly in the hand.
Cons:
- No finger grooves on it for the optimal grip.
- A little bit top heavy.
This product is best for zombie hunters who like to get into it hard and understand that every handle breaks at some point.
2. Z-Hunter ZB-047 Zombie Green Half Serrated Axe, 10 Inches
The Z-Hunter in Zombie Green has superior chopping qualities and boasts the greatest of stainless steel heads for the serious zombie enthusiast. Its strong and super durable pakkawood handle makes for some steady strikes against your enemy, and can also be used in reverse grip for hammering or driving in tent stakes, etc. The nylon sheath carries the axe safely and conveniently at your side.
Pros:
- Great price for the quality provided.
- Fun for kids (with supervision and practice).
- Very ergonomic and lightweight at 12.6 ounces.
Cons:
- Some reported their sheath was delivered in poor shape; some missing a rivet.
This product is best for the youthful at heart who take their zombie hunting seriously.
3. Zombie Killer Heavy Duty Throwing Axe Green Fire Breaker
Weighing in at only 1.9 pounds, this Zombie Killer is lightweight, has a handy removable head and handle, and is ideal for throwing. At 14 inches long with a 7.5 inch axe head and 3 inch blade, it’s masterfully sharp for easy chopping and slicing and comes with a nylon holster with a clip that holds it firmly against your side as you walk.
Pros:
- Holster keeps it close at hand and ready.
- Head and handle can be removed for maintenance and sharpening.
- Reverse side of axe head has a pick that can pierce almost anything.
Cons:
- Cheaply constructed.
This product is best for the axe thrower who enjoys the zombie lifestyle and a great bargain.
4. Fiskars 375841-1001 Super Splitting Axe, 36-Inch
This is a great axe for taller folks, ideally if they’re splitting larger (or medium) logs. With its 36-inch size, it’s known for splitting them with only one hit, too. Its perfectly geometrical design coupled with superior durability and precisely calculated swing speed, this axe is set up for ease of use and outstanding performance.
Pros:
- Famous for impressive one-strike splits.
- Has a proprietary blade-grinding technique for retaining sharper edges longer.
- Designed in Finland amidst the best forged tools on the globe.
Cons:
- Hurts the hand if you overstrike too often; wrap your hand first.
This product is best for users at least 5 feet tall who like to split their logs -- and their zombie heads -- right on the first swing.
5. Z-Hunter 4013240 Axe 13.5-Inch Overall Zb-Axe 12
This 1.8-pound throwing axe is an eye-grabbing model of high quality, lightweight craftsmanship. The black stainless steel handle is wrapped in green cord, giving a more secure grip and attractive appearance. Aside from its functional properties, it also definitely draws attention and makes a great gift for a younger zombie hunter -- with proper supervision and teaching/practice, of course.
Pros:
- Great price for the quality.
- Excellent lightweight throwing axe.
- Eye-catching design.
Cons:
- Arrives very sharp; use caution when unboxing to avoid injury.
This product is best for zombie hunters who like to throw axes while simultaneously drawing a little extra attention.
6. Schrade SCAXE5 12.8-Inch Full Tang Tactical Hatchet
At less than 2 pounds, the Schrade SCAXE5 12.8-Inch Full Tang Tactical Hatchet has a 3-inch blade and non-slip security grip for the hand and fingers to hold it firmly. Consisting of high quality steel, the SCAXE5 comes with a nylon sheath featuring a belt loop for remarkably easy portability and accessibility. The axe also has a nail pull/pry bar and spike pommel to boot!
Pros:
- Can serve multiple uses.
- Sturdy, sleek design.
- Chops efficiently.
Cons:
- Some expressed they wished the axe weighed a bit more.
- Some reported the sheath was poor quality; allowed the axe to fall when they ran.
This product is best for zombie hunting, first and foremost, followed closely by camping, outdoor survival, and everyday tasks.
7. Watchfire Camper’s Hatchet
The Watchfire Camper’s Hatchet has an imposing stainless steel blade in an attractive matte black finish, 10 inches in length with a non-slip handle. Flip the axe over to use the back of the blade to dig, pull up roots from the ground, or use it for other chores. The blade arrives sharp enough, but easily sharpens to an impressive razor edge with a little extra help -- and should maintain its sharpness for a while, as well.
Pros:
- Great for chopping kindling or branches less than 2 inches in diameter.
- Small and lightweight.
- Perfect for fitting into a backpack, hiking.
Cons:
- Accompanying sheath is not popular; feels cheaply made and falls apart easily.
- Don’t expect to use this on big logs; larger than 2 inches in diameter will take a while.
This product is best for light use chasing zombies on the trails, camping, hiking, and chopping small kindling.
8. SOG Voodoo Hawk Mini F183N-CP- Hardcased Black Axe Head, GRN Handle, Nylon Sheath, 2.75-Inch Blade
A compact yet sturdy throwing axe with a reinforced handle, the SOG Voodoo Hawk Mini is a high quality zombie weapon. Its large edge arrives sharp and later sharpens up again easily, it’s constructed of quality stainless steel, and it has a smooth black finish.
Pros:
- Comes with a limited lifetime warranty.
- Has a no-slip grip to hold the handle securely in your grasp.
- Features are balanced to ensure your best swing control.
Cons:
- Some reported blade was loose upon receipt or quickly became loosened.
- Some reported sheath snap broke just taking it out of the package.
This product is best for the zombie fighter who likes a futuristic vibe and leans toward a love of military and law enforcement.
9. Cold Steel Trench Hawk Tomahawk & Sheath
This tomahawk handles well after even prolonged rough use and meets your opponent zombies with a vengeance! The Cold Steel Trench Hawk comprises drop forged 1055 carbon, a durable head, and arrives super sharp right off the bat. The highly shock resistant handle will balance out your blows and is affordably replaceable whenever needed.
Pros:
- Has finger grips for superior handling precision.
- Lightweight and easy to carry.
- Comes with a patented sheath.
Cons:
- Some reported this is a great weapon, not a toy; is dangerous requiring caution.
This product is best used as a weapon (seriously, it’s dangerously sharp on both sides, so be careful) in the zombie war, or use for light hatchet work.
10. Officially Licensed USMC Elite Tactical Bruiser Survival Tomahawk Axe
Nothing tougher comes to mind than a member of the U.S. Marine Corps, and these official USMC tomahawks are aptly named, being as heavy duty and hardcore as they come. Their high quality construction includes a stainless steel blade, a very heavy head with reverse end piercing tool, a well-made handle, a nylon sheath, plus a few extras: a compass, lanyard, and survival pack.
Pros:
- Sturdy and well-made.
- Heavy head is ideal for chopping wood or busting zombie bones.
- Compass and survival packs are nice, useful extras.
Cons:
- Some complained the handle and grip are poorly designed.
This product is best for anyone ready for zombie combat or an outdoor adventure.
The Best Zombie Axe
From the examples we shared above, you can clearly see how the eventual inevitable zombie war will be chock full of weapon variety. The weapon of choice for the Zombie Apocalypse? Definitely the axe. And for top notch zombie head splitting, we’ve got to recommend the Cold Steel Trench Hawk Axe as the best axe option.
Not to be confused with the Cold Steel Trench Hawk Tomahawk & Sheath (our number 9 weapon highlighted above), the Cold Steel Trench Hawk Axe has all the features of a total zombie preparedness weapon and then some. The solid 19 inches of high quality construction, razor sharp edge, and shock-resistant handle (easily and affordably replaced, mind you) are all examples of this.
Lightweight and easy to grip in the average zombie-fighter’s hand, this model comes with its own patented sheath for convenient and safe carrying along. Overall, it’s beautifully made with a sleek, imposing look, sure to hold its own during any amount of zombie combat. Enjoy!